The predictable 2014 round-up

I hope everyone has had a very Merry Christmas, full of mince pies, bubbles and merriment.

So, you want to work in media?

Now, I know this post won't seem very legit, since at present I don't have a permanent job in the media. Let's gloss over that... But what I do have is almost one and a half year's worth of experience job searching, so I like to think I know what's what, especially when it comes to the job hunt.

Why being involuntarily dismissed has worked out a-okay

Dismissed", "fired", "asked to leave", "sacked", "given the boot" etc.

It's a bittersweet symphony, this life

I've been doing a lot of thinking. Dangerous, I know, but I've had a lot of time.

"When life throws you lemons..."

At quarter to five today, I became unemployed.

There ain't no rest for the wicked

I honestly can't believe it's been almost a month since I last blogged - I well and truly fell off the blogosphere, didn't I?

Life is moving pretty fast at the moment. It's quite scary and kind of sad, in a way. There have been lots of stressful times, but that's only made the chilled parts seem all the more wonderful... But there hasn't been enough time to sit and absorb these *moments* (if that makes any sense at all!)

I'm know I'm not the only one who adores the summer, but I really do bloody love it. When the sun's out I feel a lot more free and willing to get out and savour the weather. Lighter, longer days are a blessing, especially when you're in full-time work - there's nothing quite like spending a well-deserved Friday evening in a pub garden with friends, drinking pimms and enjoying the balmy weather. Nothing seems as rushed and everything seems a little easier.

There have been some big changes in my life, this month. Last week marked the end of my time at The Body Shop, where I'd worked for nearly a year in the UK PR team. It was my first proper, lengthy insight into the world of PR, and although I often found myself in difficult, overwhelming situations (99.9% of the time because of my mistakes, admittedly), I was so sad to leave all the amazing people I met and consider really good friends of mine. It was only today that it struck me just how much time you spend with your work colleagues - more time than anyone else - and how important they are in shaping your experience of work. The great thing about TBS is that even though my colleagues were all in different teams, we were always there to help each other out.

I went home for Father's Day the following day, which was definitely needed. I went sailing for the first time and even though I spent most of the time screaming "It's going to capsize!" and "Am I meant to be Port or Starboard?!", it was a good laugh, and pushed me out of my comfort zone.

I find that now that I live closer to home, I go home a fair bit. It's not because I don't like London as much as York (when I studied in York I'd only go home every few months) but I find that in London you can easily lose your head, and it's often difficult to stay grounded. I'm constantly surrounded by excess, luxury, and things I want, but can't afford. When you're here, you feel like you can have them, should have them, because everyone else seems to be living a (reasonably) lavish life. I don't know - it was easier to be sensible in York because I wasn't surrounded by possibilities and temptations, whereas here it's easy to trick yourself that you belong in a world that isn't sustainable on a modest salary. Getting out of the city gives my head a more-than-welcome break.

But back to reality. Today was my first day of my new (permanent) role at a PR agency. It hasn't really sunk in that this is my life now - that as long as I don't really screw up and I pass my probation - that I'm in a role where I can learn and progress and become involved. It's amazing! When I woke up today I wasn't even nervous because I had no idea what to expect, so didn't know what to be nervous about... After my first day I can tell that I have lots and lots to learn, but so far everyone has been lovely, smiley and welcoming, and I'm pretty happy.

And once I'm settled with my job, in a few weeks I'm moving from my beloved West Hampstead to - gasp - south of the river. As much as I adore where I live, and hope to end up somewhere as nice as NW6 in the future, my money doesn't stretch far enough for what I want. The house (yes, I'm moving from a flat to a HOUSE) will be newly refurbished and I have a balcony (my mother is already trying to convince me to buy tomato plants and the like for it... It's not even that big) and I'm really quite excited to have a view out of my window that isn't the local esso garage.

So... That's me! For those who are interested, here are a few awful quality photos that capture my life over the last month. 

                         Loving life at Kensington Roof Gardens

            Pancakes at Sofra, St Christopher's Place

I just really liked this poem.

                       Goodbye card from my Director, hand-made by his wife.

                         Leaving drinks!

                           Lunch in the sun with some of my beautiful (ex) colleagues (sob!)

                       

                       Leaving gifts. Very excited to put my a Selfridges voucher to good use!

                       

            Hangover brunch. Will I ever choose something except Eggs Royale? To be continued...

                                    

                                        Happy to be alive (and relatively dry) after sailing.

Until next time :)

For more (if rather inane) updates on my life, follow me on twitter @sofie 

Blood, sweat and tears, or "Sofie moves out"

At the beginning of this week, I said "If I can get through this week, I can get through anything." Now, on Sunday night, I can happily breathe a sigh of relief in the knowledge that yes, I DID IT.

This is what went down: 

Wrapping three digits worth of advent calendars

Creating a portfolio for...

A graduate scheme interview

My mid-year appraisal

A weekend in the midlands with my university friends including a very late night out

Packing for...

Moving to North West London. Today.

This time last week I had to remind myself that a week was only 7 days, and I could totally handle it. Maybe.

Panic.

The good news about the mass of advent calendars I sent out is I can now wrap things pretty darn well, ready for the festive season. The bad news: there were a LOT of advent calendars. I was so happy when I finished wrapping that I did a little jig in front of the post room guys. I think this just confirmed their suspicions of me as a mad lady, but I was too happy to care.

Creating my portfolio was stressful, but also a nice little boost. There's nothing like putting together a presentation about what you've achieved and giving yourself time to digest that these things are all yours, and I did actually deserve a pat on the back for my efforts up to this point.

My graduate scheme interview was a bit of a mess, since I'd misunderstood the meaning of "marketing communications" (thinking this would be similar to what I'm doing now) and after babbling about PR and how much I like working in the beauty industry, they interrupted with "So what makes you think you fit with *insert name of company* and advertising in particular? To which I may have replied something like "Um... Why not?" Oops. It also didn't help that my answer to "What was the last film you saw recently?" was "Monsters University" and it WASN'T, it was "Le Weekend", which would have made me sound so much more cultured. Sigh.

My mid-year appraisal was okay and went a lot better than I thought it would! Always a relief.

I was finally able to let off some steam with friends at the weekend and it was so so nice to see them. Especially as I hadn't seen one of them since graduation, which is now over 4 months ago. Someone please tell me where the time's going? Because I honestly don't know. It really was great to catch up with them and have a good old natter about anything and everything.

Unfortunately, I had next to no sleep last night because I was panicking so much about today, even though i'd been very good and completed most of my packing before I left for the weekend. Moving really is one of THE most stressful things. To make matters worse, my hungover/shattered state was pushed to the limit when my stepdad managed to cut open his forehead whilst loading my bits into the car. Disaster! I just heard a call of "Sofie, come here quickly" and was met with a bloodied father. It pushed me over the edge. I just started sobbing and clumsily trying to put ice into a bag rather than into a glass, THEN putting it into a bag.

I don't deal well under pressure, especially when tired, groggy, stressed, and witness to a bloodied mess of a father.

Did he have concussion? Was he able to drive? Did he need to go to A&E? Where was the nearest walk in centre?

Luckily, he was okay (just a bit sore) and we moved my mountain of rubbish into my new flat.

Phew. It's been quite the week.

So, what does this week have in store? Despite being busy, I'm hoping it will be more fun than stressful, thank goodness. I'm catching up with friends for post-work drinks, seeing Catching Fire (I. AM. SO. EXCITED. *squeals*), getting made over for our work Christmas party, and taking the following day off to recover and prepare for a weekend of excitement (I hope it's exciting, anyway!).

I might take a picture of my new room when I've got it looking all pretty. Not that I think anyone will care that much, but because I am very very happy with it. And I have a double bed again! The space is such a novelty...

Anyway, I'm starting to become a tad hysterical due to a lack of sleep/too much excitement, so I think we'll leave it there, shall we?

Glamour, the country and peppermint tea

The last few weeks have all been a bit of a blur; a blur of mail-outs, late nights, train journeys, appointments... the list goes on. It's been busy, to say the least. There have been new faces, which are wonderful (if a little daunting, sometimes) and old faces, which have been like metaphorical hugs.

Last week, I volunteered to help out at a Glamour Reader Event in partnership with The Body Shop*, which took the form of a make-up masterclass. If you haven't been to a reader event before (I hadn't), it's an event that readers sign up for (so pretty self-explanatory, really) and involves pampering and discounts.

The event was held above the Body Shop store on Bond Street and it was done up wonderfully thanks to the creative agency we work with - all twinkly fairy lights and plants and products EVERYWHERE, not to mention yummy nibbles and drinks. The masterclass was held by Lan Nguyen-Grealis, the Head Make Up Artist we worked with at Fashion Scout, and she used a model to talk through the season's best looks and gave tips how to achieve them. My favourite? For a natural take on contouring, brush a "3" shape from the forehead to the cheekbone, then from the cheekbone down to the jaw.

I enjoyed myself a lot, but it meant I had voluntarily put myself up for upwards of 12 hours a day. Whoops! Safe to say come Friday, I was absolutely exhausted. So what better way to fight exhaustion than to take some time out and visit and good friend in the countryside?

The weekend was exactly what I needed: lots of sleep (I managed to sleep in until 2pm on the first day... sorry, I'm not sorry), yummy food, good company, a lot of down time watching trashy tv and a spontaneous movie marathon (who could say no to "Friends With Benefits" followed by "Easy A"? Not us). We went fruit picking, walked the dog... and before I left we went to THE most beautiful pub I have ever visited. It looked like a miniature castle, with turrets and everything! I loved it.

My "I'm ready for the pub" selfie...

And it was nice, having someone my own age to talk to. I have lovely people at work I get on with, but we never really have chance to talk outside the office. I do miss being surrounded by 20 year olds nattering about boys, clothes and Made in Chelsea, sometimes.

I'm having to step up my game - work-wise - at the moment, testing my time management skills to the extreme! I've been arranging meetings with bloggers and press and although everyone I've met has been super lovely, sometimes it's not half frustrating trying to chase people up! My advice would be to not lose hope, and utilise every resource you have. And if that fails? Pick up the phone. It's quite ballsy, but it does get results. There's nothing worse seeing your inbox change to (1), only to realise it's not a response and have to go back to the waiting game (I hate waiting on people, have you noticed?).

Anywho, although meeting people who have been in the business longer than you is a little terrifying, it's rewarding, gives you a break from the office, and improves your confidence. It's kind of like blind-dating, but with no sexual agenda... Oh, and not to mention you get the chance to explore London's array of cute cafes and bistros. Always a bonus!

I loved Bills, located in St. Martin's Courtyard, Covent Garden

With being so busy, you'd think caffeine would be the answer, right? Well actually, no.

I've become a little paranoid that I'm taking my health for granted. I'm not doing enough for MYSELF, yet hoping that my body deals with whatever is thrown its way. In terms of getting ill, I'm a ticking bomb. So, I've decided to stick to one cup of coffee when I get into the office, and have herbal teas (my current favourite is peppermint, FYI) any time I feel myself start to lag. And tonight I'm going to start exercising again after 4 MONTHS, so you never know, I might die in the process and you'll never have to read my ramblings ever again. A blessing in disguise (maybe).

Which brings me to TODAY, where I dressed up as a Gingerbread woman and ventured into big publishing houses around the capital to deliver Ginger-themed goodies to beauty teams. Half hilarious, half embarrassing, people were divided between thinking I looked cute and plain creepy. The latter wasn't too great - fancy hearing "That's terrifying!" when you're stuck in an oversized onesie for the day, whether they like it or not. All I could do was awkwardly wave, which only seemed to creep them out more. Oh, well!

I'm in there, somewhere...

Toodle pip, and have a lovely weekend!

*Disclaimer: All opinions are my own. My opinions do not reflect those of The Body Shop, only of my, er, mind.

The best lessons are the hardest to learn.

Yes, that's right - I'm going to get all serious on you. You have been warned!

The end of the upcoming week will mark my 8th week milestone of my year-long internship.

As it stands, the internship has not gone as smoothly as I could have hoped. It's had it's perks, but it's also had its lows. 

Last week, everything got way, way, WAY too much, and I learned some very important lessons that I'm still struggling to accept.

If you don't already know (and most people that have met me even a few times will know this, because it's pretty much ingrained into my character) - I'm a perfectionist. In my mind, if something isn't done to its full potential, and it's not something I can be proud of... what's the point?

This characteristic has been my downfall - my hamartia, as good old Shakespeare would say - in the workplace.

In my position I really strain myself. I have so much to do, so many things to prioritise, remember, chase up, complete, move, etc, that I am stretched out too thinly. The problem is that with a million things on my to-do list, I can never do anything to its full potential. Consequently, what I end up doing is putting all my efforts into two or three things, and letting minute details of other things which are just as important fall down by the wayside.

I won't go into detail, 1. because it's boring, and 2. because I'm not sure if it's considered "Private and Confidential" and I don't want to get into trouble, but I made some pretty hefty errors in the last few weeks.

It all came to a head towards the end of last week, though, when I came back from a brain-melting task which had taken me close to four hours, and it was 6:15pm (I'm meant to finish at 5:30, but never do), and I still had at least 6 things to action which would take me a good while. I was exhausted, my eyes hurt, I had a headache after squinting at letters and numbers, and I really, really just wanted to get home. I was so stressed, I wanted to cry.

"Go home" my colleagues said. "I can't" I said, "I still have loads to do!"

At this point I could have just happily put my head on the table and screamed in frustration. How had I let things pile up so much? How had I gotten so behind? Why do even the smallest tasks take so long? WHY am I still here with so much to do?

But I didn't, because I couldn't. So as the aforementioned colleagues gathered around my desk and had a look through my extensive to-do list, I sat there, torn between a state of being emotional numb and mildly hysterical, and tried to breathe as they told me how they were going to help me with the sticky situation I'd gotten myself into.

"This isn't me!" I wanted to shout, "I'm a hard-worker! I try my best at everything! All I want to do is be the best intern ever and not mess up! I can do better!"

I felt like I'd failed. I felt like I wasn't cut out for the job, even though I remindede myself I was chosen out out a rather large number of candidates.

But I hadn't actually failed. I'd just tried to do everything and I hadn't communicated my problem, which was as simple as: I'm too overwhelmed.

Even though I ask questions pretty much all the time, I never actually admitted that I had too much on my plate, because I thought it was expected of me to just do what I was given and get on with it. But the issue was that I'd gotten so many things to do, and gotten into such a state that I didn't know what to do, so was consequently at a loss at how to handle everything. All I'd needed to do was metaphorically stuck my hand up and say "Help me before I get majorly overwhelmed and want to curl up into a ball to let the magic fairies sort my life out."

It's a hard lesson to learn, but I understand that it's an important one. I let my pride get the better of me, and as cliched as it sounds, pride definitely comes before a fall. The workplace is a constantly challenging environment... no one expects you to be able to silently slot in and become a super robot whizz and never say a word. Not only am I learning new skills and techniques and adapting to new routines, I am learning to help myself and communicate that in fact, no, I can't do X, because I'm still devoting a lot of my time to Y.

On a lighter note, I am lucky to be attending Fashion Scout as part of London Fashion Week between the 13th and 17th of September, which I'm very excited about. My next post will hopefully be more positive! As far as I know, I'll be helping out backstage with models and assisting our make up artist with various things, and escorting guests around the site. Wish me luck, and thanks for reading!

I'm not saying it's going to be easy...

I'm telling you it's going to be worth it.

Okay, so I'm not Ryan Gosling in The Notebook, neither am I his love interest in said movie (sob).

Nonetheless, it's the quote that sums up the last few weeks for me. And my oh my, what a couple of weeks it's been!

My departure from student-dom to adulthood began with a week at Red Bull Racing in the Marketing Department. It was absolutely amazing, especially as I'd underestimated just how COOL the company was. The people work hard, play hard, and were absolutely lovely; even approaching to ask me to ask them questions. I learnt a lot, having to listen to members of the brand, hospitality, account management and communications team, and had a brilliant time in the process (as well as consuming way too much Red Bull. For the record, I recommend the new editions). I completed my project - creating a running show car event - by Thursday, which meant on Friday I experienced Silverstone, and saw Vettel - whey!

Also, the team have a table football next door to their office, which they make frequent use of. I may have beaten my Line Manager at a game. Like I said, the company is seriously cool.

Between saying goodbye to friends and packing, the week and following weekend were crazy with moving to London preparations. I don't think anyone can prepare you for a permanent move away from home. My brother is taking over my room as I move into his (smaller) room when I return home, but my room won't ever be my room again. Scary!

And this week? Well... interning is not to be taken lightly. My role alternates between PA, product packer, unpacker, organiser, creative thinker, tally charter, newspaper-scanner and ALWAYS a sweaty commuter. Always. The amount I've had to take on board has been overwhelming, to say the least, and I'm terrified for when my lovely intern friend Sarah leaves at the end of next week after giving me a two week handover.

The tube is a whole different ball game. This week alone I've been burped at, lifted off the ground due to the general scrum, almost bowled over, stared at (creepily), been made half an hour late to work because of delays, but managed to get through 2 of The Hunger Games books. So there's always a silver lining, people.

I'm pretty much resigned to the fact that during the week I'll have to be as flexible as possible. That, alas, is the world of PR. Despite the rather glamorous upcoming events, the role I'm in is anything but glamorous. But it's okay, because everyone in this business has to start at the bottom, and at least I'm being paid, which is a lot more than some people can say.

Today I went to Oxford Street with my fellow intern, and my mood lifted significantly. This is because I realised, whilst drooling over the gorgeous prints in Zara, and the Kurt Geiger counter in Topshop, and just about everything I set my eyes on (before we got sworn at by a cyclist. Oh, London), that THIS is what I'm here for. I'm here to work, but I'm here to ENJOY. Enjoy the fruits of my labour, enjoy my freedom from the stranglehold of academia. London isn't just work for me, it's a whole new life of brilliant things that I can't even imagine.

 

So yes, my internship may end up being gruelling, exhausting, stressful and chaotic... but it's going to be worth it. It really, really is.

I just need to remember that the next time I'm given a ridiculously arduous task, which will probably be... 9am Monday morning. C'est la vie!

Does it almost feel like nothing’s changed at all?

We were left to our own devices,

Many days fell away with nothing to show.

- Pompeii, Bastille.

Even though during the last three years many days did fall away with nothing to show, Wednesday 10^th July signified the date of my graduation, the day to celebrate what I did have to show: a 2:1 in English Literature from The University of York.

Despite having worked graduation in previous years and becoming rather jaded by it all, my own graduation day was absolutely wonderful, made all the more special by being accompanied by my Mum and Stepdad.

Having finished my degree and graduated, I feel waves of relief, pride and triumph, but also of anxiety, panic and sadness.

I have worked hard my whole life to get to this point, and I have achieved what I set out to do, which is brilliant, of course.

But then I realise that from this point onwards, I determine my life.  There’s no set destination apart from the destinations I aspire towards.  Milestones of GCSEs, AS and A2 levels are far behind me, and now, so is a degree.

I’m more than happy to leave the stress of education behind (you couldn’t pay me to do an MA at this point!) but at least in education you were surrounded by people in a similar position and environment to you.

The world of employment beckons – I’m working at Red Bull for a week in the Marketing department, and the week after I begin my year stint at The Body Shop – yet I feel at a slight loss, and slightly lonely in my circumstances. My friends will no longer be there when I get home from a long, brain-melting day, and there will be constant pressures to perform on a professional and very much individual basis.

What if I’m absolutely terrible? What if the world of Marketing and PR defeats me?

And yet, working opportunities aside, I still feel about 18.  I came back from York, and it was as if time had stood still.  Everything was the same as before I set off for university (aside from the height of my younger brother, and a bush that had to be cut down to stop our house subsiding…)

But I do feel a little older and a little wiser, and I’ve returned to the South with amazing memories and friends I hope are friends for life, in addition to my close group of school friends. And I have a degree!

So even though things do change, and it is quite (read: VERY) scary, some things do stay the same, and that’s okay. The stability of my home life will hopefully keep me grounded, and I know that if things get all too crazy in the world of work, I always have a brilliant support group and a super fluffy cat ready to give me a hug.

I’m thrilled to have graduated, and excited to start the new phase of my life. So, bring it on, world! I’m ready to see what the future has in store*.

Congratulations, class of 2013!

* sorry for the cheesy ending. I do love a good bit of cheese, literally AND metaphorically.